Alicia Bohl
 

You see my parents never put any of us 4 kids above anyone else.  I guess I didn't know that was anything at the time until I was married and realized that my husbands family was not that way and I didn't understand it.  One childs basketball carrier was more important than anyone else in the family.  Later in life one or two of the siblings children were more important than the others because of what they did.  It was really an unknown to me.  I was appalled not growing up that way.  SOOO when we started having children we made sure to do things as a family not for one childs sport or another childs education.  Now that all but our youngest is gone I am excited about not having my kids under my roof any longer.  Don't get me wrong I LOVE MY GIRLS more than anything and I want them to live next door or maybe we could have a huge chunk of land that we can all build on BUT I'm ready for the freedom of my husband and I going out to dinner without worring what the girls want or the cost of more than 2 people.  I want to wake up one Friday and just decided to go on a weekend trip without making sure everyone can go or how many rooms we need at the hotel or how to keep everyone busy.  I guess you could say that I am ready to be a bit selfish with my hubby now.

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   So the best advice I can give those in the process of beign empty nesters or just starting your family....put the family above anyone person but continue to want to do things with just the two of you.  Make sure to take trips together just the two of you to prepare yourself for what it will be like when everyone has left the nest.  Make plans together and start early if you can.  Ken and I have planned out what we will do once our kids are happily on their own since they were little.  We have always had something to look forward to.  It makes that time so much more precious when it comes!  So right now we are already planning a trip to the mountains just the two of us next fall because the baby will finally be a college kid and even though she is still at home she has her own life to plan and we have ours!  

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Hope this helped someone.  Live a life you don't want to escape from or where you have to live it through someone else!

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Alicia